I’ve always been a bit of a perfectionist. I was the girl who thought there was only one truth and one way to get to the truth, but boy was I wrong. I detested that old saying— “live a little, you’ll see… “ It’s the go to statement for anyone older than you with a mission to prove that more years of life have made them wiser, more knowledgable and ultimately smarter than you. I would cringe at even the thought of the cliche because my life has often been full of serving as a supervisor to those who were older than me, and perhaps more seasoned… Obtaining their respect and attention had always been difficult, hence I’d overcome that obstacle by not telling my age and shunning anything that felt remotely like “peer pressure.” I’ve come to learn, though, that part of that age-old statement is in fact true. You do live and learn, and living does create experiences that will show you just how inexperienced you are.
As a result, with living (and not age) you learn. While it is true that age sometimes acts as a buffer for life experiences— can’t enter adult clubs before your 18th birthday, can’t drink alcohol unless the age on your photo ID says 21 years-old, age does in someways protect us from the realities of life; however in a day and time where those protectants can all be breached in some form or another, “living or the trials and errors that come from it,” despite age, is ALSO real. That’s the truth I’d always hoped the “wise ones” would have admitted. Cigarettes and drugs are getting into the hands of children, sexual experimentation is tangible for young people(some voluntarily and others involuntarily) these things are happening but just because they are happening, that does not mean that people are learning. Living or experiencing does not always equate to learning.
By Webster's definition, excellence is the quality of being outstanding or extremely good—distinct, superior, brilliant, great, accomplished; a master. As I began to reflect on this definition, I did not see the word perfect anywhere!
That reality is what brought about a new-found perspective for what it means to be excellent. Excellence is the art of EXCELLING (or growing). I recall the moment that life taught me how to rethink excellence. I was on the bed, confused, trying to gather myself after yet another break-up and after speaking with many friends, praying, talking to God, to myself and my niece’s dog—London (as I was pet-sitting while my niece traveled); I realized the very thing I had been doing to obtain closure and understanding of my recent separation was actually me acting in excellence. The pursuit of understanding coupled with the intentional act of anting and learning to change (me) is what produces excellence. Your commitment to the process and to being processed is the beginning of excellence. The habitual reoccurrence of that same cycle is how we walk in continuously as Excellence.
People who are not willing to think, to gain understanding, to learn from their mistakes, to view/admit and overcome their mistakes as opportunities to be better will not challenge themselves to do just that, be better. They will not achieve excellence. In order to be excellent we must respect and submit to process. I guess that’s why I was always offended by those who’d shut me down because of their age-superiority for what they thought was my lack of experience. In many ways, they seemed to speak from a place that said, they’d arrived and had known it all; not knowing what I’d experienced and what experiences had taught me. Needless to say, I had in my pursuit of “perfection” become just like them—limiting the power of process and the reality that process is eternal and constant. It never ends. So for the 65+ year-old mother whose father left the family when she was 6 years-old, the process of understanding how to be a daughter or how to submit to a righteous authority, is still a process… For the 30 year-old man who never received nurture from his mother; knowing how to treat a woman or a wife or a sister, for that matter, is still a process, and for the baby who has only crawled across the kitchen floor, walking is yet, still a process. The awesome thing about process is after learning to walk, you get to learn to jog, and then to run, to sprint, to skip, to leap, and dive; until life happens and you find yourself deep in your years having to learn to crawl, all over again; except this time on another level.
Life is about process and process is about becoming outstanding or extremely good—distinct, superior, brilliant, great, accomplished; a master on your level because of your willingness to learn, in your own unique way, and at God’s perfect timing.
That said, the moral of the story is, as you continue on this journey of life, what ever you may be going THROUGH (or coming to rather)— a break-up, divorce, separation from a child or loved-one, or maybe a transition in your career that has forced the need to reassess your life and your self, whatever, it may be—do not forsake process, for your growth-intended yes to the process is your journey towards the wonderful promise of being EXCELLENT. So, say yes and vow your “I do” to you!